THE FV&TTT HOLIDAY WRITING CHALLENGE!!! “LIKE FATHER
Posted: Sat Jan 03, 2009 2:17 am
I wrote this for a Beast fan on the Marvel forums, but I thought I would enter it here, as well, for your amusement. I hope you enjoy it! 
THE FV&TTT HOLIDAY WRITING CHALLENGE!!!
“LIKE FATHER, LIKE SON!”
“Me like cookies!”
“Good…good. Excellent.” said Hank, before biting into a soft, creamy Twinkie.
“So…Mr….errr….Cookie Monster is it?”
“Mmrphlphf!”
“It’s rather embarrassing really, but…I thought you were a puppet.”
“Me thought you were a cartoon.” replied C. M., rolling his googley eyes.
“Um, really?”
Hank sat on the overstuffed chair in the lounge, with a cup of tea in his hand and a plate of Twinkies balanced on his knee, looking uncertainly over at the creature seated catty-cornered to him on the sofa.
“Twinkies?” Hank proffered a plate politely.
“Me no like Twinkies. Me like cookies! ‘C’ is for cookie, and that’s good enough for me.” and Mr. C.M. sang:
“C is for cookie.
Cookie starts with C.
That’s good enough for me. (Sang Cookie Monster)
C is for cookie.
That’s good enough for me.
C is for cookie.
That’s good enough for me
Oh cookie cookie cookie starts with C!
Oh!
Cookie cookie cookie starts with C.
Oh!
Yeah!”
(Hank cradled his aching head, then took another refreshing bite of Twinkie)
“O boy!
Cookie cookie cookie starts with C!”
Cookie Monster ended his song and stuffed another cookie into his mouth.
“Very nice.” said Hank politely, “Sooooo….what brings you here, on Christmas day?”
Cookie Monster swallowed the cookie he had just stuffed into his mouth and said,
“Me am your faaaaaaather!”
“WHAT?!?!?!? Err….Right. So! You are my real dad, eh?” said Hank, thinking to humor the crazy eyed puppet, “When did this happen?”
“Last story arc. Mmmmm…glub…crunch…munch.” said Mr. C. M., as Christmas cookie crumbs shot in every direction.
“ ‘Story arc’?”
“One, two, three cookies!” counted Mr. C.M., as he stuffed more Christmas cookies into his mouth.
“Would you like some tea with those cookies…Dad?”
“ ‘T’? No! ‘C’ is for ‘Cookie’, and that’s good enough for me!”
“I think you said that already.”
“What starts with the letter T?”
“Twinkies?” volunteered Hank.
BAMF! Kurt appeared, with a fresh plate of Christmas cookies and Twinkies.
“More refreshments for you and your guest, Hank.”
“Thanks Kurt.”
“He look like Grover. You know Grover?” said Mr. C.M.
“Grover? Isn’t he the one with the big red nose and the cape” asked Hank.
But Mr. C.M. did not reply as he was once more counting cookies to stuff into his mouth.
Kurt took the empty tray and bamfed away again, in a cloud of pink smoke. As the smoke cleared, Hank looked over at his guest and nearly jumped out of his fur.
“HANK!”
“Wha…?”
“I love you, Hank!” announced a big purple T-Rex with unnaturally large hips. The T-Rex bounced over to Hank and clutched Hank in a tight hug with its tiny arms, as it sang:
“I love you, you love me.
We’re a happy family.
With a great big hug
and kiss from me to you,” SMACK!
The T-Rex kissed Hank as Hank valiantly tried to wriggle away.
“Won’t you say you love me, too?”
Hank struggled out of the grip of the purple T-Rex as it finished warbling it’s song, and looked closely at his Twinkie, wondering if the expiration date was too far past. He looked up at the dinosaur and asked, in a trembling voice,
“Who are you?”
“Don’t you know me, Hank? I’m Barney. I’m your FATHER!”
“NOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!” cried Hank, as he fell backwards over the coffee table.
“You know it to be true. I love you, Hank!” and Barney reached for Hank, who scrambled up and skipped out of reach. Barney laughed merrily and jumped into the air with a nimbleness which belied his avoirdupois figure. He kicked his purple heels in mid-air and landed with a laugh and a wiggle.
“Let’s dance! Let’s do the Dino Dance!”
Barney sang:
“There’s a new dance craze
Sweepin’ the country
And it’s called the dino dance.
It’s a lot of fun…” etc. etc. etc.
“Help.” whispered Hank, as he dodged about, trying to avoid the bouncing dino.
“First you hop, hop, hop
All over the place.”
Hank hopped over a chair, in his eagerness to escape the hopping dino.
“…Shake your dino tail
While you make a funny face.”
sang Barney, shaking his huge purple tail. Hank grimaced from behind the chair and Barney called, “Ha, ha! Great funny face, Hank!”
“Everybody start twisting and turning…”, sang Barney.
Hank twisted out of Barney’s loving reach.
“We’re gonna do the DINO DANCE!”
“AHHHHH!” cried Hank. He found himself lying on the sofa, a plate of Twinkie crumbs by his side.
BAMF!
“What’s going on, Hank?”
“I think I dreamt that I was a comic book character and my dad came to visit. It was scarier than all reason! First my dad was a puppet, then he was a big purple dinosaur.”
“That‘s funny!” laughed Kurt. “I could believe that. Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha!”
“I dreamt that you were a comic book character too and that your dad was the devil.”
Kurt stopped laughing at once, narrowed his eyes and said,
“That’s silly! That makes absolutely no sense! Did you check the expiration date on those Twinkies? Also, you seem to have been watching public television. That could give anyone nightmares.” Kurt clicked off the television and bamfed away.
Hank lay thankfully on the sofa and contemplated the idiosyncrasies of the world, as he thoughtfully nibbled Twinkie crumbs.
“I would really like some lasagna.” said a voice. Hank sat up and gazed in terror at a striped orange cat with distinctly cartoonish features, sitting catty-cornered from him on the other sofa.
[Edited on 8/1/09 by neling4]
THE FV&TTT HOLIDAY WRITING CHALLENGE!!!
“LIKE FATHER, LIKE SON!”
“Me like cookies!”
“Good…good. Excellent.” said Hank, before biting into a soft, creamy Twinkie.
“So…Mr….errr….Cookie Monster is it?”
“Mmrphlphf!”
“It’s rather embarrassing really, but…I thought you were a puppet.”
“Me thought you were a cartoon.” replied C. M., rolling his googley eyes.
“Um, really?”
Hank sat on the overstuffed chair in the lounge, with a cup of tea in his hand and a plate of Twinkies balanced on his knee, looking uncertainly over at the creature seated catty-cornered to him on the sofa.
“Twinkies?” Hank proffered a plate politely.
“Me no like Twinkies. Me like cookies! ‘C’ is for cookie, and that’s good enough for me.” and Mr. C.M. sang:
“C is for cookie.
Cookie starts with C.
That’s good enough for me. (Sang Cookie Monster)
C is for cookie.
That’s good enough for me.
C is for cookie.
That’s good enough for me
Oh cookie cookie cookie starts with C!
Oh!
Cookie cookie cookie starts with C.
Oh!
Yeah!”
(Hank cradled his aching head, then took another refreshing bite of Twinkie)
“O boy!
Cookie cookie cookie starts with C!”
Cookie Monster ended his song and stuffed another cookie into his mouth.
“Very nice.” said Hank politely, “Sooooo….what brings you here, on Christmas day?”
Cookie Monster swallowed the cookie he had just stuffed into his mouth and said,
“Me am your faaaaaaather!”
“WHAT?!?!?!? Err….Right. So! You are my real dad, eh?” said Hank, thinking to humor the crazy eyed puppet, “When did this happen?”
“Last story arc. Mmmmm…glub…crunch…munch.” said Mr. C. M., as Christmas cookie crumbs shot in every direction.
“ ‘Story arc’?”
“One, two, three cookies!” counted Mr. C.M., as he stuffed more Christmas cookies into his mouth.
“Would you like some tea with those cookies…Dad?”
“ ‘T’? No! ‘C’ is for ‘Cookie’, and that’s good enough for me!”
“I think you said that already.”
“What starts with the letter T?”
“Twinkies?” volunteered Hank.
BAMF! Kurt appeared, with a fresh plate of Christmas cookies and Twinkies.
“More refreshments for you and your guest, Hank.”
“Thanks Kurt.”
“He look like Grover. You know Grover?” said Mr. C.M.
“Grover? Isn’t he the one with the big red nose and the cape” asked Hank.
But Mr. C.M. did not reply as he was once more counting cookies to stuff into his mouth.
Kurt took the empty tray and bamfed away again, in a cloud of pink smoke. As the smoke cleared, Hank looked over at his guest and nearly jumped out of his fur.
“HANK!”
“Wha…?”
“I love you, Hank!” announced a big purple T-Rex with unnaturally large hips. The T-Rex bounced over to Hank and clutched Hank in a tight hug with its tiny arms, as it sang:
“I love you, you love me.
We’re a happy family.
With a great big hug
and kiss from me to you,” SMACK!
The T-Rex kissed Hank as Hank valiantly tried to wriggle away.
“Won’t you say you love me, too?”
Hank struggled out of the grip of the purple T-Rex as it finished warbling it’s song, and looked closely at his Twinkie, wondering if the expiration date was too far past. He looked up at the dinosaur and asked, in a trembling voice,
“Who are you?”
“Don’t you know me, Hank? I’m Barney. I’m your FATHER!”
“NOOOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!” cried Hank, as he fell backwards over the coffee table.
“You know it to be true. I love you, Hank!” and Barney reached for Hank, who scrambled up and skipped out of reach. Barney laughed merrily and jumped into the air with a nimbleness which belied his avoirdupois figure. He kicked his purple heels in mid-air and landed with a laugh and a wiggle.
“Let’s dance! Let’s do the Dino Dance!”
Barney sang:
“There’s a new dance craze
Sweepin’ the country
And it’s called the dino dance.
It’s a lot of fun…” etc. etc. etc.
“Help.” whispered Hank, as he dodged about, trying to avoid the bouncing dino.
“First you hop, hop, hop
All over the place.”
Hank hopped over a chair, in his eagerness to escape the hopping dino.
“…Shake your dino tail
While you make a funny face.”
sang Barney, shaking his huge purple tail. Hank grimaced from behind the chair and Barney called, “Ha, ha! Great funny face, Hank!”
“Everybody start twisting and turning…”, sang Barney.
Hank twisted out of Barney’s loving reach.
“We’re gonna do the DINO DANCE!”
“AHHHHH!” cried Hank. He found himself lying on the sofa, a plate of Twinkie crumbs by his side.
BAMF!
“What’s going on, Hank?”
“I think I dreamt that I was a comic book character and my dad came to visit. It was scarier than all reason! First my dad was a puppet, then he was a big purple dinosaur.”
“That‘s funny!” laughed Kurt. “I could believe that. Ha! Ha! Ha! Ha!”
“I dreamt that you were a comic book character too and that your dad was the devil.”
Kurt stopped laughing at once, narrowed his eyes and said,
“That’s silly! That makes absolutely no sense! Did you check the expiration date on those Twinkies? Also, you seem to have been watching public television. That could give anyone nightmares.” Kurt clicked off the television and bamfed away.
Hank lay thankfully on the sofa and contemplated the idiosyncrasies of the world, as he thoughtfully nibbled Twinkie crumbs.
“I would really like some lasagna.” said a voice. Hank sat up and gazed in terror at a striped orange cat with distinctly cartoonish features, sitting catty-cornered from him on the other sofa.
[Edited on 8/1/09 by neling4]
Very nice!
Very amusing, lol!