The 'mental health' thread.

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fourpawsonthefloor
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The 'mental health' thread.

Post by fourpawsonthefloor »

It struck me that while I've shared some of the things I've learned over the years with odd people here and there, it may be a worth while thing for us to all share what things work for us, in the hopes that others may find use from it as well.

Cause let's face it. Mental health is often a hugely overlooked area that impacts life profoundly. Not everything works for everyone, but sometimes as you muddle through the midden pile, you find the odd gem for you.

One of the greatest things that I'm working on right now is three simple concepts, that end up not being that simple to do: Non-attachment, non-judgement and non-suffering. It's pretty buddhist in ways, but it brings up some valuable things.

Non-attachment doesn't mean that you don't make close relationships or have stuff that you love. Far from it. Non-attachment means that you don't get unhealthily attached. A good example was that the person sitting at a campfire, watching it's beauty, reaches out to the flames and gets burned. The idea is to learn from this and still enjoy the fire, while not trying to grab it and getting burned. The non-attachment was and still is the hardest part for me, as I can end up buying into many things at any given moment. However, when i do manage to practice it, honestly it's pure freedom. I can live life in all the muddle without getting sucked into it.

Non-judgement is also an issue, because it is so stinkin' easy to point fingers. And that's also part of my make up too - but it's also a good one to let go, because once you just let people be, you're not predetermining their destiny. That is up to them to write. If you're practicing good non-attachment, it gets easier to non-judge.

Non-suffering is the payoff that you get when you manage the other two. Life is easier, simpler and pure. You can open yourself up to other things now that your energy isn't being sapped by the first two.

Ok, that's my nugget. Any questions? Any other things that work for others (including books or what have you)?
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The 'mental health' thread.

Post by Ult_Sm86 »

It's very zen...

It reminds me of the Tao of Pooh.

Some funny/clever excerpts from the book:
Everything has its own place and function. That applies to people, although many don't seem to realize it, stuck as they are in the wrong job, the wrong marriage, or the wrong house. When you know and respect your Inner Nature, you know where you belong. You also know where you don't belong.
and
When you discard arrogance, complexity, and a few other things that get in the way, sooner or later you will discover that simple, childlike, and mysterious secret known to those of the Uncarved Block: Life is Fun.
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The 'mental health' thread.

Post by Scumfish »

That's kinda like what I've learnt to live by, Paws - why waste effort and energy on those when it can be put towards something far more enjoyable?

Speaking as someone who is recovering from a suicide attempt and is fighting anorexia (on a very mild level, I hasten to add) at the moment for me, peace of mind is very very important. It always has been, for one reason or another, but recently it's become something that's almost necessary for my day-to-day coping. And as you can imagine, with my head being the mess it is and suffering from ADHD to my level, peace of mind is not exactly easy to come by.

But I've found a few things that help. The trick is keeping it simple, learning to take pleasure in the things you can do, rather than mourning what you can't. So I can't climb walls any more or run down the street, but I can take a walk with a friend once a week and simply sit and talk if I need to. I can't stand for more than five-ten minutes on my bad days but I can still sit in a high-stool and cook. I've learnt to really, really appreciate what I have, and taking pleasure in a meal well cooked, a drawing well-sketched, or a piece of writing or a room that I've managed to clean, well...it gives me peace of mind and a real sense of accomplishment.

Everyone has to slow down sometime, no matter what age - the trick is learning to appreciate life, not be bitter about what you've 'lost'. Every sunrise is something to take joy in, because even if I haven't slept the night before it's still something beautiful and at least I can still see - and these days...at least I'm still alive to see it.

That's my attitude, anyway :)
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The 'mental health' thread.

Post by Elwing »

Yes, but the taboo remains. I'm really glad to have found this place, where I feel safe and can talk about my problems. It truly is a safe haven to many.
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The 'mental health' thread.

Post by Angelique »

I have to also mention how thankful I am also that this forum has become a safe place for people to discuss their issues. It's harder to think and be positive when you're swimming against the tide of negative stereotypes. But there's little point in me getting angry about it because those who disparage others as "crazy" aren't likely to listen to me anyway.

However, a positive or at least neutral attitude toward my own post-traumatic stress has made coping a lot easier. Regarding it as a normal part of having seen some pretty messed-up stuff makes it easier to talk about it.
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The 'mental health' thread.

Post by Scumfish »

I found this, funnily enough, on a fetish forum I go on. There's a group there that deals with BDSM and depression, often with useful support and advice. Obviously this is not mine, it was done by a member of the forum but having read it after some bad news, I wanted to share it in case it helped anyone.
Dear Everyone who gets the blues and/or has other mental health issues.

remember Happiness is a state of mind.

if it is turning your favorite song up loud and dancing and/or singing to it
if it is standing in the mirror and trying to smile
if it is allowing yourself that last bit of choccie, DO NOT feel guilty about it
if its putting on a pair of sunglasses and a hat to hide behind when you go stand outside - it is fine ... most people are so wrapped up in themselves that they dont notice others, it is us sensitive souls who feel the pressure.
Let life empower you - try and let the smallest thing make you happy - a blossom, something funny, a good rant, even changing your bed linen

... please dont fall into victim mode -

remember there are cretins out there ready to knock us down for some perceived failing - don't allow others peoples opinions to get you down

and remember this:

if you are smiling no-one knows what you are thinking.

so keep you personal power
you arent hiding anything from people who wouldnt necessarily help you
you arent saving face
you are smiling ... and ... happiness is a state of mind.
(cos your head controls your heart)

and who wants to be lectured about how bad someone else has got it - to lift you from your funk - over xmas lunch!

if someone says "oh you seem a lot better" and you are breaking inside just thank them and if they try to talk to you further about it just say you would rather talk about something else - ask after their kids/pets/ the sweater they are wearing, or just say you are going to help in the kitchen.

and if all else fails

try this :
Just for today, I will try to live through this day only,
and not tackle my whole life problem
at once. I can do something for twelve hours
that would appall me if I felt that I had to
keep it up for a lifetime.

(its from the AA , i was going through a really difficult time and someone left it on my desk at work ... and while it wasnt easy to even read it, it did help a bit)

everything is going to be alright.
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