7/20 Instance: Fridge From Narnia

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Svartfreja
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7/20 Instance: Fridge From Narnia

Post by Svartfreja »

Current Timeline.


<Spider-Woman> "I'm telling you it's not going to fit..." Jess stood at the top of the basement steps and watched the approach of the portable lab as it came up from below.

<Carol> "It'll fit!" Carol argued, giving the rectangular metal container another shove. They'd tried getting it in the elevator but it was too wide in all directions for that. The stairs were their only hope.

<Spider-Woman> "It really won't..." Jess crawled halfway up the wall to sit and watch, head cocked on one side. This Carol was just as stubborn as her Carol. Better just to wait and then she got to say 'I told you so'.

<Bobby> At the bottom of the stairs, behind Carol, Bobby peered past the shiny refrigerator from Narnia and watched Not Jess perch on the wall. His life got weirder, and weirder, and weirder...

<Carol> The container bumped the ceiling and Carol frowned. Not to be beat, she shoved harder and scoured a nice chunk of plaster off the roof of the tunnel.

<Spider-Woman> "... That is cheating, Not-Cap." Jess commented from above.

<Carol> "Bite me!"

<Bobby> "Oooo, you're letting all the asbestos out, babe."

<Carol> "Not helpful!" Carol turned a glare on Bobby, shifting the weight of the silver crate and trying again. "You're sure I can just shove it around and nothing'll get broken?" she called up the stairs.

<Spider-Woman> "Pretty sure..." Jess called back, "Tony dropped one off the Triskellion once while Hank was inside... he was pissed but everything he was working on was fine..." Jess eyed the doorway and the crate again. Nope. She grinned to herself.

<Bobby> "Think an ice slide would help? Slick it up a bit?" He looked between Not Jess and Carol, though a shift of the Fridge of Doom blocked his view of the weirdo from another world. Well, wait... that applied to both of them. The spidery one.

<Carol> "Give it a try..." Carol's feet left the floor because they would slide on ice. "I really really don't want to come up through the lawn..."

<Bobby> He stepped forward and raised both hands to better aim, coating the steps with a thin layer of ice.

<Carol> Ice assistance provided, Carol gave the crate another shove. Maybe too hard. It shot up the steps alarmingly quickly. "Shit!"

<Spider-Woman> Jess dropped from her perch and rolled to avoid the crate, watching it sail over her and bounce down the corridor into a wall. "Good news!" Jess announced as she sat up on the floor, "I was right!" The doorway at the top of the stairs had some serious damage from the crate's corners.

<Bobby> "Never underestimate the ice." Bobby blew frost off his fingertips and rode his own ice slide up the steps to the landing, ducking the crumbling doorway. "Asbestos ahoy!"

<Carol> Following Bobby up the stairs, Carol surveyed the damage, "Well... it's not so bad..." sure a couple of the walls were leaking insulation but it could have been a lot worse. "And if there's still asbestos in the ceiling, someone slacked off and is getting fired...." She looked down at wrongJess, "Did I nearly hit you with that?"

<Spider-Woman> "Yes... but I've learned not to take having furniture and other large items thrown at me as a personal insult..." Jess got to her feet and dusted herself off. "It happens more often than any of us care to admit."

<Bobby> "Welp, maybe the worlds aren't quite as different as it seems." Bobby smirked and dissipated the ice. "Soooooo, what's all this for again anyway? I mean I like a good fridge as much as the next guy, but then again I kinda am a fridge."

<Spider-Woman> "It's not a fridge, for a start," Jess headed to inspect it for dents.

<Carol> "Supposedly it's a lab... I'm still waiting to see what happens when we get it to where we need it." Carol wrinkled her nose, "If it explodes... someone's in trouble."

<Spider-Woman> "If it explodes, it's Tony's fault and you're allowed to punch him." No dents! What the hell did they make these out of?

<Bobby> "Well, I've had my share of labs in fridges I suppose... the stuff that grows on the Chinese takeout leftovers in the back of the fridge has to qualify as a lifeform." Bobby wandered over and rapped on it with his knuckles, eyeing Not Jess in her really tight outfit while he was at it.

<Spider-Woman> "Sooooo.... where are we going with this?"

<Carol> "Take this side, I'll get the front so I can steer... Bobby can you watch the corners so I don't get stuck in a door or in a turn...?" She frowned at the box.

<Spider-Woman> Jess used her sticky hands to lift the end of the box off the floor, tilting it so Carol could get her fingers under it too. "If you get it stuck again, I'm retreating to a safe distance..."

<Bobby> This Jess had just as much of a rack as the other one. Impressive. Most impressive. "Sure. Still doesn't tell me what it's for, or how it's a lab. I mean... a little bitty lab? For what?"

<Spider-Woman> "It's not little... it looks little, sure," Jess adjusted her hold as they hit a surprise corner already, "Hey! Warn me before you do that!"

<Carol> "Sorry! I forgot you were there!"

<Spider-Woman> "Forgot, my ass..." Jess rolled her eyes, "As I was saying... The Pyms like to shrink stuff down... so what you see here is like... the police box of the TARDIS...."

<Bobby> Bobby stared at it. "Sweet! Bigger on the inside! Still. What's it for? Do I have to make big sad eyes at you?"

<Spider-Woman> "Space bugs," Jess gave him a half shrug, "We're helping... supposedly... at the moment it just looks like we're helping to demolish the place..." There was a crash as something fell off an end table.

<Bobby> Bobby moved quickly to pick it up and backed up to look around the next corner. He moved another table. "I'm so going to have to make with the big sad eyes. There a Raid factory in there or something?"

<Spider-Woman> "Chemical warefare is not my department... I think your Greer is doing that down in the basement with the friendly bug kid." She tilted the box when otherCarol warned her there was a corner, "This is for following Tony's specific instructions and building a thing that he wasn't sure would hold up through interdimensional portals without blowing up..."

<Bobby> "Riiiiiiight." He gave the box another hairy eyeball. "See, I'm kinda glad our Tony is just President. Other people blow things up for him."

<Spider-Woman> "He's good at it... not the President Tony, the blowing stuff up one... not that I'm saying your Tony is a bad President I just know ours would be awful at it... and I'm going to shut up now."

<Bobby> "Hey, it's good to see some things stay the same." He grinned at Jess and moved a chair aside. "Corner!" Once they passed the obstacle, he turned to walk backward and cock his head. "Except your accent is wrong. So wrong."

<Spider-Woman> She laughed, "I guess your version of me didn't move to the US long enough ago to pick up the accent?"

<Bobby> "Nooo, she's all English all the time. Pip pip cheerio, care for a spot of tea?" His accent was atrocious and his grin broad.

<Spider-Woman> She laughed harder at the attempt at the accent, "Oh I can turn it on and off like a switch..." She decided to demonstrate, "Would it make you feel better if I did?"

<Bobby> "Well now you sound like Jess, but, but... the outfit." He made a helpless gesture and this time kept his eyes far away from her chestular region.

<Spider-Woman> "I can't do anything about that," she did adjust her hold on the crate to tug her mask down and run a hand through her hair. Then she looked up, "Why are we in a stairwell? For the love of God, if we have to go up another flight of stairs..."

<Carol> "Relax! We're staying on the ground floor!" They were even almost there, just two more awkward doorways to go! "Uh... tilt it a bit..." damn doorways...

<Bobby> "Tilt more! Tilt more!" Bobby cocked his head in the same direction, wincing when they still managed to scrape the edge. "Yeah, your outfits are way worse than ours. I mean, I guess they're more traditional superhero aaaaand that appeals to my inner fanboy, but it's not super practical, y'know?"

<Spider-Woman> "I need these things," she shifted the crate again and raised her arm to extend the wings on her suit, "Otherwise getting around would be a real pain in the ass."

<Carol> Flailing a little to keep her balance when the weight shifted again Carol shot a glare over her shoulder then changed direction quickly, apologising not at all convincingly when Jess complained about a collision with a wall.

<Bobby> "Kinda more bat than spider, innit?" He dropped back into the accent for a moment.

<Spider-Woman> "I can't fly without them, I sort of glide... Most other Avengers fly all by themselves... which is really unfair."

<Bobby> "Our Jessie flies. That's... weird." He scrunched his face and looked at Carol. "You sure this's really a parallel world totally parallel to us?"

<Carol> "There are differences, little ones..." she stopped at the door to the classroom she'd pre-cleared.

<Spider-Woman> Jess was surprised by the sudden stop and leaned to look under the crate, "Why'd we stop?"

<Bobby> "'Cause, Lucy, we're home!" He looked at the doorway and then the box, then back. "I think we need to take the door off."

<Spider-Woman> "We don't," Jess muttered, "Just wait..."

<Bobby> "Wait for it?" He smirked. "So... Jess... you never could fly?"

<Spider-Woman> The front end of the crate hit the floor and Jess shook her head, "Nope never, I can glide pretty well though so I get by... and if I need to go somewhere really far away I just hitch a ride."

<Carol> There were too many doors in this building and none of them were wide enough. She could fix that. Carol took measure of the crate then took out part of the doorframe to make enough room.

<Bobby> "Um... Carol, babe, agent lady... I thought that's what we were trying to, like, avoid?" He watched with a wince at the mess.

<Carol> "Well I can't think of another way to get it through the tiny door, can you?" There was probably enough space now. She picked up her end again.

<Spider-Woman> "It's really reassuring to know that Carol has the same amount of patience wherever you go."

<Bobby> "You guys sure you don't have a me over there?" He just followed them into the room, kicking aside a piece of the wall on his way in.

<Spider-Woman> "No idea but I can check in a minute..." she set her end of the crate down when she felt Carol's end go down again. "Okay... stand back... sometimes things go all over..."

<Bobby> "Riiiiight, of course they do." Bobby backed up, and really considered hopping back into the hall. Instead, he shifted to ice. Just in case.

<Spider-Woman> Jess climbed on top of the crate and keyed in the code she'd been given before hopping up onto the ceiling out of the way. The crate unfolded piece by piece then objects seemed to grow into being from tiny specks. Work stations, equipment, raw materials and tools all sprang up out of nowhere.

<Carol> Carol levitated to avoid a welding station, "That is so cool..."

<Bobby> "Yeaaaaaah. Torn between wicked cool and WTF here," he said with a laugh, taking a long backward step into the hall until it was done.

<Spider-Woman> "You get used to it," Jess stepped to the main station and sat down on a chair that helpfully presented itself then turned on the computer screen, "Oi, Janet, tell Tony it's working." The small woman on the screen about fell off her stool. "I know, I know, there needs to be a bell or something!" Jess rolled her eyes as the woman disappeared from view.

<Bobby> Deciding it was safe, Bobby shifted back to flesh and edged into the room. He peeked over the Not Jess' shoulder at the screen, then decided to poke a robotic arm.

<IronMan> "Hey!" Tony rolled into view on a chair, "Nothing blew up!"

<Spider-Woman> "Was that a concern?" Jess raised an eyebrow, "You said this was safe!"

<IronMan> "I was eighty percent sure it was," He peered at the figure over her shoulder, "Don't touch that end!"

<Bobby> Bobby raised both hands instantly, turning slowly to see his boss on the screen. Sort of. "It's Not Tony!"

<IronMan> "... Sure!" He eyed the kid again in case he had any more thoughts about touching the arm, "Okay, did anything get broken?"

<Spider-Woman> "I don't think so..." Jess looked over her shoulder, "You're going to have to forward me a list of what's not safe to touch so I can put a sticker on it or something..."

<IronMan> "Nah, they'll learn from their mistakes." He dismissed it with a wave of his hand, "Uploading instructions now."

<Bobby> Well that was too tempting to pass up, so he turned back around and poked the business end of the robotic arm. Just because.

<Spider-Woman> The arm fired a repulsor blast that sent Jess up to the ceiling. "What the hell?!"

<Bobby> Of course, since he'd partially iced up before his smooth move, Bobby was basically unharmed, but the stump he showed Jess was impressive. "Ahhh, my arm!" he deadpanned.

<Carol> "Oh God, do you have to do that?" Carol rolled her eyes, "So... that question about things getting broken? May have to rethink the answer." Bobby's hand hadn't been the only casualty.

<IronMan> Tony frowned then leaned close to the camera and stage-whispered, "Is no one going to ask about the hand?"

<Bobby> "Nope," he answered Not Tony. "See how cruel this world is? Nobody cares!" Bobby grinned and reformed his hand, shifting back to flesh and taking a bow.

<Carol> "He's fine." Carol stole otherJess' vacated seat and decided to use the time attached to the other world's servers to google Bobby.

<Spider-Woman> Jess stood up on the ceiling and folded her arms, "Just send replacements for everything that was over there," she gestured to the blast radius of the arm.

<IronMan> "... I'll send spares... I can also provide a Pym. No, you do not get to pick which one."

<Bobby> "There are two of them there? We just had one here..." He was a little disappointed with the reaction to his prank. Eh. No sense of humor in this other world.

<Spider-Woman> "They're married," Jess informed him, "Janet, who you saw briefly there, and Hank... Janet's the co-leader of the Avengers... and she designs most of the costumes - it's a hobby."

<Bobby> "Oh, so she's to blame." He nodded, slowly. Nope. No sense of humor.

<Spider-Woman> "Not for this," she gestured at her own costume, "Or Carol's... or Tony's..."

<IronMan> "Hey! My suit is a work of art!"

<Bobby> Bobby narrowed his eyes, suddenly stepping back into range to peer into the monitor. "Yeah, yeah, we have Armani here too." Suddenly, he grinned. "You know, I babysit your daughter."

<IronMan> "... I have a daughter over there?" Tony stole a glance over his shoulder, "I don't know what to say to that..."

<Bobby> "You do." His grin spread, reaching manic preportions. "She's a soul-stealing ginger."

<IronMan> "Oh that's okay, I work with three of those. I've learned when to duck and cover." He laughed.

<Carol> "Hey, the X-men exist over there!"

<Bobby> Bobby did a double take, distracted. "They do? I mean, we do?" Oh! "Oh! Oh! Is there a me?"

<Carol> "I'm looking," Carol scrolled down the list of known X-men, "Yell if you spot yourself."

<IronMan> From somewhere behind Tony there was a loud bang. Alarmed, he got up from his seat, "Be right back! Fire!"

<Bobby> Distracted, he looked away from Carol's screen and back to Not Jess and Not Tony. "Riiiiight."

<Spider-Woman> "It's okay, that happens all the time," Jess finally dropped back down from the ceiling, twisting to land on her feet. "Maria probably stuffed crayons in something for a laugh."

<Bobby> "Maria?" He tried to look at the screen with files showing the X-Men in action, but it was hard! So much to stare at.

<Carol> "Other me's kid," Carol supplied. "She's a handful."

<Bobby> "Riiiiight, Not You has a kid, aaaaand," he looked at Jess with a grin. "You're married to David Sum."

<Spider-Woman> Jess nodded, "I am... and we have a kid too - just in case you were wondering," she smirked.

<Bobby> "Our Jessie does too. I'm waiting for the poor thing to sprout the shark teeth. Still, you married to David cracks my shit up."

<Spider-Woman> Jess laughed, "Why? .... And why shark teeth?"

<Bobby> "You're married to Sebastian Shaw." Bobby bared his teeth in a predatory grin.

<Spider-Woman> "Oh I know - I met him... your version of him, that is. On day one of the weird portal." Jess sat down on the corner of the station, leaning to see if Tony had reappeared yet.

<Bobby> "Oh, so you got to see the teeth in person then!" Bobby cackled.

<Spider-Woman> "I wasn't really looking at his teeth?" Jess giggled, "Actually I was confused and then had a tiny freakout and ran off..."

<Bobby> "Really? Shit, how'd you miss 'em?" He wrinkled his nose in disappointment.

<Spider-Woman> "Afore mentioned confusion and frreaking out... and he distracted me by asking questions about me... and there was a Brood... It was a weird day."

<Bobby> "Yeah... Brood. Well, that's Broo, and he's not really a Brood, but he's part Brood, but..." Bobby waved a hand. "Nevermind. What's this labby thingy going to do to help us with the real Brood. Broo's nasty evil bug trash cousins from space?"

<Spider-Woman> "Yeah I know he's only part Brood... and I know about being part bug." She gave a half shrug, "The plan is to build some weapons that can be easily replicated and very quickly..."

<Bobby> "Great big cans of Raid," he nodded.

<Spider-Woman> "We were thinking more.... kill it with fire... if you want giant cans of Raid, go talk to your babybrood and your Greer," she offered him a half grin.

<Bobby> "Oh look, you can get a joke!" Bobby golf clapped. "I prefer ice... kind of my thing."

<Spider-Woman> "I get jokes - I make jokes even!" She shoved him.

<Bobby> "Ow, violent too, just like ours." He rocked with the shove. "Anyways, ice works on them, right? I mean, it did before on the Viper bugs."

<Spider-Woman> Jess raised an eyebrow, "Viper bugs? Uh... I don't know if I can help you with that distinction but Brood are space-faring... they're pretty resistant to temperature extremes but maybe..."

<Bobby> "Oh, babe... you haven't seen temperature extremes." He grinned. "Yet."

<Spider-Woman> Jess patted him on the head, "You're cute."

<Bobby> In a shocking show of maturity, Bobby poked out his tongue at her.

<Spider-Woman> She laughed, "And they trust you with children?"

<Bobby> "I have a kid, thankyouverymuch! And yes, yes they do."

<Spider-Woman> "Having a kid is not proof of being good at it - case in point; Carol... and also Tony." Native Carol seemed to have been absorbed by googling people she knew.

<Bobby> Bobby was actually a little offended now. "I'm a good dad..."

<Spider-Woman> Jess raised an eyebrow then her expression softened, "I'm sure you are."

<Bobby> "Anyway." He straightened up. "I can reach close to absolute zero. Close enough to create superconductive fields."

<Spider-Woman> "That sounds... dicey." Her nose wrinkled.

<Bobby> "Apparently you don't have anything like me in your world." That sucked, but maybe it was for the best.

<Spider-Woman> "Maybe you should look for yourself later, I think Carol got distracted.... and I don't know what happened to Tony either... probably forgot we were here."

<Bobby> "Welp, time for a coffee break then." Except he didn't drink coffee. "Or tea. Beer, maybe."

<Spider-Woman> "Any of the above is good for me," she got to her feet, "Show me to the kitchen?"

<Bobby> "Sure thing, babe. I kinda wanna call your counterpart and make her come over for shenanigans and comparison."

<Spider-Woman> "That sounds like fun," Jess grinned, "But first, kitchen." She glanced at Carol on her way to the door, "Should we send her coffee? She looks like she might be there for a while."

<Bobby> "Suuuuure, we can find a minion and make them do it. Just tell them to follow the trail of destruction." He kicked aside another chunk of the doorway on his way through.
:quicksilver Pietro Maximoff [Quicksilver]

Quicksilver: Howisshe?Isshealright?Imusetspeakwithmysisteratonce.
Hawkeye: What is that noise?
IronMan: That is the noise Pietro makes right before he's tossed out of the airlock. ~ Avengers: The Children's Crusade #6
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