7/21 Instance: Life Support

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tears~fall~like~glass
Dread Pirate
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7/21 Instance: Life Support

Post by tears~fall~like~glass » Mon Jul 22, 2013 2:28 am

timeline: after Welcome to the Jungle


<Sophie> Sophie sank into a chair in the library, staring into the empty fireplace. Burned. Julian had been burned. She turned her head to stare out the window instead. She pulled her knees up to her chest, glancing down at her guitar. She didn't even feel like playing it. She didn't want to go to the stables or study or do anything, so she just sat there in the stillness and stared out the window.

<@Kevin> Kevin was hiding out in a stack on the floor, reading some feel-good stories trying to take his mind off burnt corpses and the pungent smell of burnt flesh and metal when he heard someone come in. He tensed, but it wasn't a danger. He crept as quietly as he could to the end. Sophie.  He cleared her throat as he went toward the chair. She looks like she could use cheering up.  "Hi, Sophie," he said. 

<Sophie> She glanced up, searching his face for a moment before she responded. "Hi, Kevin. I haven't seen you in awhile." She slid her feet down to put them on the floor, facing him a bit.

<@Kevin> "You ok?"  True, she said she'd been different, but he really didn't see a huge change. She did look absolutely miserable. He knew the feeling. Reaching out, he pulled her into a hug more for himself than her, he was going to admit it. 

<Sophie> Sophie wrapped her arms around Kevin, hugging him tightly. "Not really. They told me about the plane crash. Julian..." she trailed off, unable to finish the sentence.

<@Kevin> He was only mildly shocked that she was hugging him back, but he went with it. "Yeah. It was really bad."

<Sophie> "He was my family. Not legally or anything, but he was always there. He was like a brother." She held onto him, feeling a bit better with him there.

<@Kevin> "I'm so sorry, Sophie." He swallowed against the images of burnt bodies. "I'm so sorry."  He held her close, pulling her off the chair. 

<Sophie> She felt the first few tears starting to fall from her eyes as she held onto Kevin, coming out of the chair. She didn't really know what to say except, "Thank you."

<@Kevin> Oh no. She's crying. "It's going to be okay. We'll find out who did this, and then we'll get them."

<Sophie> "But it won't bring him back," she told him softly. Sophie rested her head against Kevin as she wiped her eyes with one of her hands.

<@Kevin> "No. Death is permanent, Sophie."

<Sophie> The sob escaped before she could stop it. She knew that, of course. She knew death was final. It was so hard to accept that she was never going to see Julian again. She'd never get to go to him for help or have dinner with him again. She tried to figure out how she felt and finally settled on empty. She felt empty. She let herself cry against Kevin, accepting the situation. "I know."

<Sophie> "What if you had gone on that mission too?" she wondered aloud.

<@Kevin> "I'd be dead, too," he said simply. 

<Sophie> He wasn't, she reminded herself. He hadn't been. It was just Julian. She still had Kevin. Wiping her face and sniffling again, she smiled just a bit. "Thank you for being direct."

<@Kevin> "Yeah. Of course, Sophie." He nodded. "Do you feel  better now?"

<Sophie> "Maybe a little," she told him, wiping her eyes again. "Do you?"

<@Kevin> "Not really." He shrugged it off.

<Sophie> "What can we do to fix that?" She wondered aloud, sniffling and drying her face.

<@Kevin> "Nothing, but it's okay." He gave her a weak smile.

<Sophie> "Julian was always the one who told me what I needed to do in emotional situations. I don't really know what to do now," she admitted.

<@Kevin> "You did just fine. Just do what comes naturally?" He was lost. He had no idea what one earth to say to her, really.  He'd gotten used to her being so distant so the fact she was opening up was disconcerting.

<Sophie> "It's hard to even know that anymore. Things that I did my entire life don't feel right anymore." The reverse was true as well, that things she hadn't done her entire life did feel right, such as sitting with him. He was calming and warm. She felt better since she had ran into him, but still not 'normal' or 'happy'.

<@Kevin> "I think it'll take a while to figure things out," he offered. "You could talk to the psych doc."

<Sophie> She gave a shudder at the suggestion. "I'm not sure how I feel about doctors. I can talk to you... but you're not ok either."

<@Kevin> "I'm the wrong person to talk to." He realized she was still in his lap, and he gently extricated himself from her and scooted away until his back hit the side panel of a stack. "I like the psych doc. I just need to get things right in my own head before I can talk to her."

<Sophie> Pulling her feet up to her chest again, Sophie watched him speak, processing it all internally. "So... she's ok to talk to then?"

<@Kevin> "Yeah, I think so. It's her job."

<Sophie> "Maybe I can do that... Maybe." She let her feet fall back to the ground, sighing a bit. "Why does it all just feel so... heavy?"

<@Kevin> "Because it is? It's not a nice world, and most things are ugly and horrible and..." Well, that went somewhere... "Er, emotions are complex?"

<Sophie> "They are." She rubbed her face a bit, gathering her thoughts. "It was kind of nice... before. I mean, I had emotions... but they, I don't know, it was just different."

<@Kevin> Kevin shrugged again. If it was about art, sure, he could expound. But on the subject of autism and emotions and becoming non-autistic (how did that even work?) and being a raging sack of emotions, he had nothing. "I can go to the doc with you, if you want. I really can't say very much to help you." 

<Sophie> "Would you?" She brightened up at that prospect, smiling at him. "I'd really appreciate you going with me."

<@Kevin> "Yeah, of course." He smiled as she looked happier. "Just let me know when you want to go."

<Sophie> "I will," She relaxed a bit. "It's a lot less scary now." After a pause, she asked, "Are you hungry?"

<@Kevin> "Not really. Are you?" He stood up. "I could have something to drink, though."

<Sophie> "A little bit. A drink sounds good though." She got up from her seat, smoothing out her clothes.

<@Kevin> "Well, let's make a pit stop and then you can eat." 

<Sophie> "What kind of pit stop?" She moved to follow him, not sure where they were going.

<@Kevin> Kevin grinned. "The kind that has booze."

<Sophie> "Esme drinks... but I've never tried anything alcoholic." She shrugged, smiling back at his grin.

<@Kevin> "Now's a good time as another." He held the door open for her. 
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