6/13 Instance: Hate to See Your Heart Break

[tears~fall~like~glass]

timeline: before House of Blasphemy


Rachel: Rachel had slipped out of the room while Paige was still asleep, though she highly doubted she would still be as she slipped back into their room with her haul of crap from the store, most of which was junk food. After dumping the bags on the pink couch, she kicked her shoes off near the coffee table before dropping back into bed behind Paige, rolling onto her side to hesitantly place an arm around her waist, resting her cheek against her shoulder.

Paige: At the touch from Rachel, Paige burst into tears again. She clung to the hand around her waist, sobbing as her free hand passed her phone to Rachel with the text message from her brother pulled up. Her parents were officially disowning her. Not just her mother being crazy... disowning her for good.

Rachel: After she'd briefly glanced over the screen of the phone, she pressed the button to lock its screen and tossed it to the half of the bed they weren't occupying. That had been exactly why they'd decided against letting everyone know, and it was pretty shitty that one of them couldn't even be assed to call. However, she kept that opinion to herself for the moment. Instead, she simply muttered, "Turn this way."

Paige: Mustering some kind of strength, Paige rolled over to face Rachel, unable to catch her eyes.

Rachel: With a sigh, Rachel didn't bother trying to speak to her yet mostly because there wasn't really anything she could say that would make this better, so she laid there and tolerated the tears soaking into the shoulder of her jacket.

Paige: It took several moments for Paige to soothe herself. She lay next to Rachel, utterly exhausted from all the crying and out of tears again.

Rachel: She reached up to lightly run her fingers through Paige's hair, turning her head slightly to kiss Paige's forehead, finally mumbling, "I got you a lot of candy and booze and a bunch of other stuff..."

Paige: "Don't ever leave me..." Paige whispered to her.

Rachel: That was another reason why she'd been reluctant in wanting to tell Paige's family. Rachel hadn't been sure how she'd deal with a comment like that, and it was surprisingly easy to assure Paige that she wouldn't with a simple, "Okay." Things like that were always easy to agree to because the problem was keeping the promise.

Paige: Paige settled down more, closing her eyes and keeping close to her. "I'm sorry... it wasn't supposed to go like that."

Rachel: "You don't have to be sorry..." Rachel bit down on her lip before admitting, "I didn't exactly help the situation."

Paige: "She's just... crazy." Paige bit her lip too. "Crazy!"

Rachel: "I..." she started, pausing as she debated whether that's what she wanted to say. She decided it was and continued, "I noticed."

Paige: Paige giggled a bit at that, snuggling into Rachel. "I am so glad I'm with you."

Rachel: This was actually going far, far better than she'd expected. So far, anyway. "I'm glad you are because I probably match that level of crazy with my stripping."

Paige: "But so incredibly sexy." Paige sighed a bit. She had missed seeing Rachel naked.

Rachel: "I was tempted to point out how often you thought that, but I'd already gotten you in enough trouble."

Paige: Blushing, Paige hid against Rachel. It hurt so much to think about her family, but being with Rachel made a lot of that just melt away. "I love you so much... you know that right? Even without reading my mind?"

Rachel: "I don't really spend a whole lot of time reading minds," she confessed in a mumble, giving a nod, "So, yeah, I know."

Paige: Paige smiled and stroked Rachel's cheek softly, sniffling just a little. "Thank you for not letting me die."

Rachel: Rachel rolled her eyes at her, "You weren't going to die."

Paige: "You know I don't like heights... I was scared... Really scared."

Rachel: "Well, you're fine now," she commented, deciding to move on, "I also bought us new toothbrushes and stuff because I'm pretty sure we left all of that."

Paige: "You think of everything." Paige kissed her girlfriend softly.

Rachel: "I don't," Rachel simply insisted after returning the kiss. While she paused to gather words, she shifted slightly to slide her hand under Paige's shirt, gently rubbing her back. Finally, she asked, "Y'know we don't have to do this whole thing where we pretend we're okay, right? Moping and being upset is fine."

Paige: "I am ok when I'm with you..." Paige protested, rubbing her nose gently against Rachel's. "Everything is ok. It's... when the world starts to invade... and it sucks. It sucks so much."

Rachel: She had no idea how everything could be okay at the moment, and she bit down on her lip, eventually muttering, "So talk to me about it."

Paige: "No." Paige snuggled into Rachel.

Rachel: Rachel scowled and disentangled herself, abruptly swinging her legs over the edge of the bed as she sat up. Pushing her fingers through her hair, she looked over to the clock, the scowl deepening when she realized she still had a while before she could even use having to teach a class as an excuse.

Paige: Her eyes watered immediately. She was so tired of everyone being mad at her. She sat up, glad she knew her way to the bathroom without having to see very well. She shut the door harder than she meant to, collapsing on the other side as she slid down to the floor. Back pressed against the door, Paige brought her knees to her chest and gave in to the tears.

Rachel: That was precisely why she hadn't wanted to agree to not ever leave because staying wasn't always something she was good at, especially when frustrated. Though, she prided herself on the fact that she was even still sitting on the bed. In fact, without Paige taking up half the bed, she was able to flop back, pressing the heels of her palms into her eyes.

Paige: Paige just stayed where she was, trying very hard to regain control. It was incredibly hard to focus with her family gone, Rachel mad at her, and the bathroom floor was cold. Paige just ended up sobbing harder.

Rachel: Deciding she'd reigned in her annoyance, Rachel rolled off the bed and pulled the door to the bathroom open, hooking an arm around Paige's waist to haul her up. "Get off the floor, and talk to me about this, Paige," she insisted, hating how she sounded like she was pleading with her.

Paige: Unsure of if she wanted to get closer or further away from her, Paige bit her lip and shook her head. "I don't want to talk about it. I don't want this to be real. I don't want this to happen."

Rachel: "Well, it is real and happening." And she hated to sound harsh, but this was apparently what needed to happen. "And, not to sound selfish or anything, but I want to talk about it because you're not the only one that's upset over it, except I don't want to have a completely one-sided conversation like we do with just about all your other problems." With a sigh, she added, "Plus, I'd like for you to deal with this, which won't happen without talking."

Paige: "Then talk," Paige snapped at her, wiping her eyes.

Rachel: "I would punch your mother in the face if she wasn't your mother. If anyone else talked to you like that, they'd have a broken jaw," Rachel started, managing to maintain her cool, "I feel bad, and I worry about you being pissed at me because I said some really stupid things, and I should've listened to you about leaving sooner."

Rachel: "I didn't want you to tell them or for them to find out because I really, really wanted it to work out," she added more softly, releasing her loose grip on Paige to go sit on the edge of the bed again, "Because it was... nice," she shook her head, "I've never really had that with my family."

Paige: "I wish you had..." Paige admitted, kicking her foot a bit. "I wanted to..." She moved to lean against the bedroom wall, not looking at Rachel. "I didn't want them to find out either."

Rachel: "I doubt it would've changed the result even if we had left," Rachel muttered.

Paige: "I meant punch my mom," Paige's face turned bright red.

Rachel: "...Oh," Rachel blinked.

Paige: "Just... once."

Rachel: "Or twice," she muttered.

Paige: "I'm tired of everyone being mad at me."

Rachel: "No one's mad but your family," Rachel replied as she laid back into the mattress once more, scrubbing at her face.

Paige: "You are. Because I don't want to talk about this."

Rachel: "I'm not mad... I'm slightly frustrated."

Paige: "I just lost my entire family because I love you and not somebody with a penis. I'm not ok. They are mad at me. God is mad at me. And everything sucks. Is that what you want to hear?"

Rachel: Rachel lifted her head to look over at her, "Is that what you actually feel like?"

Paige: Well no. Paige sighed, sliding down to the floor again. "Not everything..."

Rachel: "So, tell me the rest," she said softly.

Paige: "My mother beat me with a BROOM. You know I'm scared of heights and you told me to jump or die."

Rachel: Another moment where she'd run her mouth without really thinking about it. She cringed, "Well, I got beaten, too... Though, I think I find it a bit more amusing than I should. Also, I wasn't really thinking when I said that."

Paige: "You stripped in my super Catholic house..."

Rachel: "Well..." Rachel started and paused, brow furrowed, "I'd say I'm sorry, but I'm really not sorry because I meant it when I started to say I'm not ashamed."

Paige: "I'm not ashamed of the tattoo or you... but you stripped in front of my mother."

Rachel: "I regret nothing."

Paige: "So you liked stripping for my mom? Maybe I can get you her number."

Rachel: As she stared up at the ceiling, she smirked a bit at the teasing tone of Paige's voice, easily shooting back, "I don't think I'm her type, and she's definitely not mine. Plus, I'm not really into being smacked around."

Paige: Paige shook her head a bit. Could this be over already? "They've always been there for me. Through everything. And now... they all just... back away."

Rachel: "For a pretty bullshit excuse because it's not like you can help... Actually, I'll just stop myself right there." It was definitely too soon. Taking a breath, she continued when she thought she could be more serious, "It's shitty, especially when it's not exactly something you control, but it'll get easier to deal with... And, they might get over it someday."

Paige: "Do you think they will?" Paige gave her a sad, hopeful look.

Rachel: "Maybe. I mean, all your siblings are old enough to think for themselves, and I would like to think they have brains," Rachel shrugged, adding, "I wouldn't get your hopes up because you don't necessarily need them or their approval. Plus, I know you probably know better since you're all cool with God, and I'm really not, but it's really not their place to judge you, and you can believe whatever the hell you want."

Paige: "I know what I believe, Rachie," Paige told her softly.

Rachel: "Good," Rachel replied simply because that wasn't particularly something she cared to get into, though she supposed she would if she had to. There was also her meeting this morning that she was debating whether to even bring up, but she didn't really know how that would go over... So, she decided she didn't really care to go over it either. Not right this moment, anyway.

Paige: "Is it ever going to get easier?" Paige moved to sit down beside Rachel on the bed.

Rachel: Rachel turned her head to eye Paige's back from where she was laying, the idea of sitting up entirely unappealing. Though, she'd have to in order to go teach class soon, which didn't persuade her in the least. She reached out to run her hand over the small of her girlfriend's back, since that was about as comforting as things were getting with how she was laying, and answered, "Eventually."

Rachel: After pausing for a moment, she hesitantly continued, "They aren't the only family you have, y'know. Everyone here loves you, and I know it's not the same, but they'll help… If you let them."

Paige: "I wasn't allowed near them for so long... and I missed them so much. How could they do this to me? They know what I've been through." Paige bit her lip, trying not to cry. Again.

Rachel: Rachel had words to answer that question, scathing words she really, really shouldn't voice to Paige. Or at all, she supposed. Reluctantly forcing herself upright, she slid her arm around Paige's waist and pressed a kiss to her shoulder blade, shaking her head, "I don't know."

Rachel: Not only was that the best answer she could muster nicely, she didn't even know all of what Paige had been through, only vague details. On some level, it was likely better that way, especially knowing she was prone to fits of murderous rage.

Paige: Paige sat in silence for awhile, letting it sink in. "I really am glad I'm with you... even with all bad," Paige told her softly, placing her hands over Rachel's. "I don't want you to think anything different."

Rachel: "I'll try to keep it in mind, especially when I want to strangle you for not letting me be there for you," she teasingly mumbled against Paige's back, her smirk dropping as she sighed, "I have to go teach a class soon."

Paige: "You are here for me... this is what I need. Just to be close to you. I won't keep you from your job though..." She smiled just a bit. "You'd never strangle me, silly Rachie."

Rachel: "Well, I think you should find someone to talk to as well." Even if it wasn't her, however she wasn't up for voicing that because she wanted it to be her. "Like, Bobby. He's been disowned before." Though, so had she at one point in time. However, Bobby was someone else she'd trust, so that made him the next best thing. "I don't necessarily mean right now either because it's fine if you want to wallow in bed with all the candy I just bought."

Rachel: Leaving it at that, Rachel released her and kissed her forehead as she got up to put her shoes back on, flashing her a smirk as she commented, "And, no, I wouldn't, but that doesn't keep me from wanting to occasionally."

Paige: "I just don't want to talk about it... maybe ever. It won't change anything. It sucks... you know it sucks. I'm not sure what else there is to say about it." Paige curled back up into their bed, grabbing the nearest bag of candy.

Rachel: After slipping the chucks back on, she pulled the various bags of candy from the ones on the couch and unceremoniously dumped them onto the bed, leaning down to steal a kiss, "Just think about it. I'll check in after my class lets out."

Paige: "Kiss my like that again and I might," Paige teased her.

Rachel: Shooting a quick look to the clock, Rachel leaned over to catch her lips again and placed a hand flat against the mattress to steady herself while she reached up to tangle her fingers in Paige's hair with her free one. Breaking it, she mumbled against her lips, "Better get to thinking."

Paige: She would be thinking alright. Paige swallowed, nodding just a bit, looking up into Rachel's eyes. "Ok."

Rachel: "I love you, but I really have to go or Monet will glare at me more than she already does," she said as she straightened, "I'll see you later."

Paige: Smiling a little, Paige nodded. "I love you too." She reached for the bag of chocolates, she smiled a little more. Yeah, Rachel was totally worth the heartbreak.