Timelined a day or two after Shaw Strikes Back
<Jessica> Jess lay on her back across the sofa, twirling a paper crane between her hands and staring at the ceiling. She'd been that way since she got back from work and showed no signs of moving anywhere else despite it being close to dinner time. This had become something of a regular fixture since her talk with Kevin in the Danger Room and she had yet to come up with a coherent plan to fix it.
<Shaw> It was something Sebastian had come to expect as well when he came home - the sight of Jessica moping over her lost love. He wondered about the day when he would come home and she wouldn't be there at all.
<Shaw> A muscle in his jaw ticked when he spotted her and he gave her a polite nod as he dropped his keys on the table. Without another word, he went into the bedroom.
<Jessica> She flinched at the loud sound of the keys on the table cutting into her thoughts and turned her head to look for him but he'd already gone into the bedroom. She sat up, running a hand through her hair after she dropped the crane next to the keys. With a sigh, she got to her feet and followed him to the bedroom, pausing in the doorway.
<Shaw> He heard her and looked up as he stripped off his suit jacket and tie. "How are you today, Jessica?" She didn't go to school, and he hadn't seen her since this morning, although even then she had gotten up before him, at what time he couldn't guess. She'd already been miles away by then.
<Jessica> She shook her head and gave a half shrug, not really sure how to answer that question. She knew she wasn't okay but she didn't feel particularly bad either.
<Shaw> Biting back a sigh, he pressed his lips together and nodded. After a few moments of occupying himself putting up clothing and arranging items on the dresser, he tried again. "Are you hungry?"
<Jessica> After a brief pause, she decided she was hungry and nodded, moving over to him for a hug. "I'm sorry..."
<Shaw> He accepted the hug and wrapped his arms around her in return, kissing the top of her head. He closed his eyes.
<Jessica> "I haven't really been... here lately, have I?" She rested her head on his shoulder, turning her face into his neck.
<Shaw> "I've been trying to give you... space, I suppose." He'd never been terribly good at this part of relationships.
<Jessica> She nodded, giving him a gentle squeeze, "Thank you..." Lifting her head, she managed a small smile. "But I'm still sorry... haven't been great company I'm sure..."
<Shaw> Sebastian opened his mouth, closed it, licked his lips, then decided on another tack. "No apologies are necessary."
<Jessica> "That's not true... they're very necessary..." she cuddled him again, closing her eyes and breathing him in. "I've been horrible."
<Shaw> He shifted his weight to keep her close and stroke her hair. "Here or not due to your upset, I'm glad you have at least stayed."
<Jessica> She lifted her head again, studying his face. "Sebastian..."
<Shaw> It took him a moment to respond, and he did only by meeting her eyes, his own expression carefully blank.
<Jessica> "I'm not going to leave... I said I wouldn't... and I meant it..." and it hurt her that he thought she would. She bit her lip, letting go of him and turning back for the living room.
<Shaw> He sighed and rubbed a hand over his face - his right, of course, and he stopped to look at it again.
<Jessica> Crossing the living room, Jess moved into the kitchen to start making a cup of tea and perhaps take her mind off of things. Leaning against the counter, she bit back a sob, attempting to stifle it before hiding her face in her hands. Everything was falling apart.
<Shaw> Hearing her crying now, he sighed again and followed her into the kitchen. Hovering behind her, he was unsure how to proceed. "Jess..."
<Jessica> "I'm fine." She lied, attempting to gather herself.
<Shaw> "You are not." Sebastian turned her around and pulled her against his chest.
<Jessica> "Why would you think that...?" she pressed her face into his shoulder, sliding her arms back around his waist.
<Shaw> He didn't want to answer the question, and her last reaction to honesty hadn't been stellar. "I am not the cause of the end of your relationship with Kevin Ford, but I am an... accessory."
<Jessica> Goddamnit! What did that even mean?! She banged her head against his shoulder a few times. "Do you want me to leave?"
<Shaw> Confused, Sebastian grabbed the back of her head to stop that right off. "What are you doing?"
<Jessica> "I don't know..." But now she was sort of trapped. She turned her face away from him, "You haven't answered my question."
<Shaw> "Don't hurt yourself." He tried to see what she was doing, but she resolutely looked away from him. "Of course I don't want you to leave, but neither do I want to become a source of bitterness over what happened with Ford."
<Jessica> "Why would I want to leave the only person that's actually been decent to me in the past six months?" She watched him out of the corner of her eye, "Leaving you is the last thing I want to do right now..."
<Shaw> He nodded, swallowing. "Let's just say you aren't the only one with baggage."
<Jessica> She looked at him properly, "Leaving you wouldn't fix anything... it'd make everything a lot worse... I said I wouldn't leave and I stand by that... I'm just... hurting a lot... some things were said and they got to me..."
<Shaw> "Said by whom?" Since she'd finally met his eyes he moved his hand to her face and brushed his thumb over her cheekbone.
<Jessica> "Who do you think?" She reached up to take the hand on her face, turning her head to gently kiss his palm.
<Shaw> "So you talked to him, then." He watched her attentions to his hand, again coincidentally the very one Ford had tried to remove.
<Jessica> She nodded, "The day after.... I wanted to see if he was alright...."
<Shaw> He curled his fingers around her hand. "And I surmise it didn't go well, which is the cause of... well, the last week."
<Jessica> She nodded, looking down at the floor. "He called me a whore..."
<Shaw> "I see." Sebastian tried to keep his tone even, but he considered if he'd known this he may have scared the boy a bit more.
<Jessica> "A lot of people have called me that... but I never expected to hear it from him... and it hurt..." She moved back to him for another hug.
<Shaw> "I'm sorry, love." He held her close and sighed.
<Jessica> "I wanted to try and at least stay friends because I can't pretend that I don't still care about him... but he won't let me... and it's just so hard to let go even after all this time has passed..."
<Shaw> Nodding, he knew she couldn't see it. He was glad she couldn't see his expression either. It was always the same, wasn't it?
<Jessica> She wondered how far she should go with her explanation but she didn't feel right keeping it from him now. "He was the only person I've been able to say 'I love you' to since my dad... and now he hates me... and I know it's my fault because I messed up and everyone's expecting me to do the same with you... and why shouldn't they?"
<Shaw> It took an effort not to react, as Ford had said exactly that to him.
<Jessica> "I don't have a good reputation, Sebastian... I know I've said this before.... but you have to know why... so if this is too much... don't feel guilty...."
<Shaw> "I've told you," he paused to swallow and started again. "How I feel - it hasn't changed."
<Jessica> "Well that was before my ex melted your hand..." she pointed out, though somewhat muted. "I'm just saying... if this gets to be too much of a headache..." She lifted her head to look at him, "I'd understand..."
<Shaw> Sebastian studied her face and quietly shook his head. The dread was still there, but he didn't want to voice it.
<Jessica> She managed a small smile, tilting her head up to give him a soft lingering kiss.
<Shaw> Unable to help himself, he cupped her face in his hands and deepened the kiss. When finally they broke apart, he took a deep breath. "I hesitate to say this, because I don't want you to take it the wrong way."
<Jessica> She frowned a little in confusion, "What is it?"
<Shaw> "I don't want you to leave me," it was taking all of his self control to keep his tone even on those last two words. "But if you need time, in consideration of what you have just been through, I would understand."
<Jessica> "Time for what, Sebastian?" she cocked her head on one side, "Lying around and moping?" She shook her head, "I've known it's over since the start of summer... but I didn't do any of this then... I waited... for some ridiculous reason I waited... maybe I felt like I needed to serve some kind of penance, I don't know.... but please don't think that changes anything of what I feel for you."
<Jessica> She made sure to meet his eyes, "I care about you a lot, Sebastian... at least as much, if not more, than I did for Kevin..." and she was very careful to use past tense there because she knew she had to put that behind her and now was as good a time as any to start.
<Shaw> He didn't hide his reaction to that, as it was more than he'd expected. Much more. So, he smiled and gave her a chaste kiss. "All right. Thank you... for telling me."
<Jessica> She took a deep breath and blew it out again in a long sigh, feeling a little better for it. She gave him a proper smile, "You're very welcome." She slid one hand across the back of his shoulders and up into his hair while the other arm went around his waist, catching his lips for a proper kiss.
<Shaw> It was a relief for her to act like her old self, or at least more like herself, and he responded. Tangling his hand in her hair, he held her close for the kiss. This time, when they broke apart he smiled and pressed his forehead to hers to hold her eyes. "Come home with me."
<Jessica> She blinked at him, "... We are home."
<Shaw> He laughed. "Pittsburgh. I need to go back to take care of something... and I don't want to go alone." Considering this, he kissed her again. "More specifically, I don't want to leave you here."
<Jessica> She frowned a little, "Don't take this the wrong way... but it's not because you don't trust me... right?"
<Shaw> "No, no, not at all. I wish I had taken you with me to England." For several reasons. "It occurs to me that I now know much of your past and it seems only fair that you learn about mine, if you are so inclined."
<Jessica> "Okay..." she nodded, "Okay... good..." she gave him a hug, "I'd like that... if you're okay with that..."
<Shaw> "I would like nothing more," he said, closing his eyes to embrace her again.
<Jessica> "Then I will come with you." She gave him a squeeze, "Probably good timing for it too, considering... I know I could use the break..."
<Shaw> "Well, a vacation in the Steel City it is then." He kissed her temple. "I'm sure you'll be charmed and horrified."
<Jessica> She laughed a little, "Sounds thrilling!"
<Shaw> Her wording reminded him of something and since his mood was vastly improved he couldn't resist. "Oh yes, we'll have to prepare. Perhaps with an evening of classic film - have you ever seen Night of the Living Dead?"
<Jessica> She shook her head, "Sounds like... zombies?" Which, considering present company, was already amusing. She gave him a grin. “I like my zombies."
<Shaw> "As you should.” Sebastian's brow arched and he ducked his head to nip at her neck. “I believe we should order some take-out and educate you on Pittsburgh culture."
<Jessica> She giggled, lowering the hand on his back to pinch his ass playfully before pausing, "Oh God, is that movie full of the terrible accent?"
<Shaw> "Yeah," he laughed, dropping into it with slight effort. "'Cause it's eternal. What's wrong with ya anyway?"
<Jessica> Jess stared at him for a long moment, then burst out laughing.