White Snowy Thing 2015 [Adam]

[Scumfish]

<@Toxic> There was fire. It was everywhere, the heat was stifling and causing blisters even where he was, hiding. The smell of burnt meat turned his stomach, but he was screaming too much to care, the smoke burning his throat and lungs until he couldn't breathe any more. There was blood, everywhere, blood and bits of bodies...

<@Toxic> Then he was running through a forest. The trees were ashen, the ground uneven and there were people swinging from meathooks on every branch. It's not my fault! He sobbed. They made me!

<@Toxic> Adam was having nightmares, and some horrific ones at that, struggling and whimpering, sometimes yelling in the nest, blood smeared over his face where he was crying.

<Jolen> Jolen however was passed out nicely next to his friend and one arm over him cuddling the pair together in the heat of the nest and more then happy about this. For awhile they'd had to stop the cuddling just while Toxic got back to beings used to the idea.

<Jolen> Murmuring in his sleep at the noises Adam got pulled in alittle more and nuzzled, something in german getting muttered down the guys ear to try and get him to stop fidgeting. Then a struggling arm thrashed out and caught him in the face.

<Jolen> "Huh?!" Jumping awake he blinked at the crying Adam in confusion, gently shaking his shoulder. "Adam? Adam? vake up you having a nightmare."

<@Toxic> Adam jerked awake suddenly, an arm blurring as he knocked Jolen's off him, a blade coming out as he struggled out of the nest and tried not to retch. He half-fell out, ending up on his hands and knees and shaking as he slowly realised he was awake. But those dreams...they'd been so real.

<@Toxic> His memories still weren't great, there were large chunks, but those were...those were from them, weren't they? He swallowed, realising Jolen was staring at him, before beginning to sob uncontrollably, hugging himself.

<Jolen> The arm had hit him in the chest knocking him back into the pillows so the blade had missed him luckily he did however scrabble out of the pillows (in just his boxers) to get to Adams side. "Breath mien Freund, just breath and take it easy ja?" Voice heavy with the accent as he'd just woken up.

<@Toxic> "God, I - I killed people - I did it - didn't I - oh god-" He couldn't draw breath properly, his throat was closing as the panic and the bile rose, eyes starting to flare red as he panted. His voice was barely above a whisper, the usual rough hoarseness made so much worse. "Oh - oh god - I'm a killer-"

<Jolen> "Shush shush Toxic calm down, I don't know about that but it vas probably just a bad nightmare, please take deep breaths Ja?" He wanted desperately to pull Toxic in for a hug and cuddle him but not while he couldn't breath and was panicking.

<@Toxic> "No - I remember - I can-" He gave up on talking, not quite able to get the breath needed. He needed to calm down, bad things happened if he didn't, he needed to - the happy box, where was it? He couldn't think, sobbing and trying to gulp in breaths as his eyes went completely red. He could feel the flames again, that had been straight from a memory, he could hear their heartbeats-

<Jolen> "Please try and calm down toxic or you'll make yourself vorse." Moving alittle closer and starting to rub Toxic's back gently trying to help calm him.

<@Toxic> "Don'tdon'tdon'ttouchme-" He was shaking and hot under the hand, clammy too, trying to jerk away from Jolen but not getting very far. Jolen was safe, right? Then why was his heartrate picking up? Oh god, he could feel his heartbeat, he could feel everyone in the school's, no no nononononono-

<Jolen> Jolen jerked his hand away and instead clutched at his own heart as he felt it flutter alittle in his chest. "Sorry I didn't mean to, I just vant to help Toxic, your safe her you've got me to protect you. God that felt weird..." Rubbing his chest alittle and watching the lad.

<@Toxic> "Notsafenotsafe-" He was starting to feel dizzy as hell, trying to concentrate on his breathing as the memories pushed over him, tearing through him - how it had felt, when he'd killed his parents - the feel when he'd stopped the home from removing his blades - hanging the guy from the hook and feeling his heart stop- "God help me..." He whimpered.

<Jolen> Jolen coughed as his heart fluttered again, carefully sitting himself down and wondering what was wrong with him. "T-toxic your safe you just need to breath, I'm going to look after you ok?" Safe with a half hearted voice as he went alittle dizzy heart starting to pound in his chest and a dribble of green blood started oozing from his nose."

<@Toxic> Adam looked up at Jolen through a red mist then, before his eyes widened at the sight of the blood. "No, nonono not you, no please-" He was half-begging, scrabbling to try and find something to stop the rising heat he could feel - just like when he'd killed his parents - no, not Jolen, anyone but Jolen!

<Jolen> Wiping his nose he saw the blood. "Toxic calm down I just have a nose bleed could you get me a tissue for it please?" Because the blood was starting to run abit more he had to pinch his nose and tilt his dizzy head back. "Probably just knocked my nose while we were asleep just breath and hand me the tissues."

<@Toxic> "No, I'm doing that, it's me - oh god everything's burning, I-I can't stop it, I can't remember how!" He wailed the last word. "Please, please help me, I don't want to!"

<Jolen> Jolen scrabbled and grabbed his forgotten shirt to hold against his flowing nose for a moment before struggling back to his knees, body feeling heavy and yet floating as he moved. "This is you? If they are your powers then you just need to calm down, stop thinking about burning ok?"

<Jolen> Something wet ran down his cheek and touching it he realised it was blood, he needed to find a way to distract the guy or calm him down! "Please deep breaths for me try and calm down."

<@Toxic> "I'm - I'm trying-" And he was, he really was, but the panic had got hold of him now and despite him rocking and squeezing his eyes shut the heat still climbed. "I can't do it! You have to run - I-I can't!"

<Jolen> "I c-can't run ... feel to dizzy...." Swaying alittle as his heart pounded and his body felt like it was burning up, bloody tears ran down his face as he moved towards Adam. "Ssssssh I'm h-here your safe now please Adam..." He nearly passed out then as his head went but he managed to crawl back over to Adam.

<@Toxic> "Nooo..." He sobbed, hands gripping Jolen and trying to brush the blood away, trying to stop the heat but it was like holding water - without knowing how to, it was just climbing, and he knew if he didn't stop - if he- "Jolen, p-please, you have to, not you, please not you..."

<Jolen> Through the dizziness he dropped the shirt stemming the blood now pouring from his nose, not that it made much difference from the amount coming from his eyes as well now the white taking on a weird green tinge. To hot everything was far to hot.... passing out for a moment he forced himself back out of urgency.

<Jolen> Toxic needed a distraction otherwise he was going to end up killing him and possibly everyone in the school, then he thought of something that had managed to fully distract him once. Vines flying out he pulled Adam down for a kiss as he slumped over the guys lap.

<@Toxic> Adam froze. In fact, everything froze. The heat stopped the moment those lips had touched his, because someone was kissing him. Him. No, not someone, Jolen was kissing him. Wow. Jolen was...before he realised it, the heat was dropping rapidly, the shock cutting through the panic and fear as he half-cuddled the slumped Jolen.

<@Toxic> He whimpered, then kissed him back fiercely, holding him tightly, eyes squeezed shut.

<Jolen> Despite the blood and tears making everything taste alittle weird the distraction had turned into something oddly wonderful. As the heat in him dropped suddenly and his heart started slowing he was able to come back alittle into this world and kiss back with everything in him.

<Jolen> He didn't want to stop kissing the guy now.

<@Toxic> The kiss actually calmed Adam down, only the odd hitch in his breath as the heat carried on dropping, then faded altogether. He had Jolen half-cradled in his lap, and he realised the other wasn't pulling away, even when the heat was gone...this was...not something he ever expected...

<Jolen> The dizziness mostly went away as his heart got back to normal and it meant he could really start enjoying the kiss properly. Vines reforming into a hand he cupped Adams cheek and his thumb stroked at the skin, as nice as kissing Jack had been this felt nicer more passionate?

<Jolen> But then Jack was his friend and just liked cuddles, he got to take care of Adam and sleep next to him he was so much closer to Adam and this was adding much much more to it.

<@Toxic> Adam did need to breathe, though, and having not done that so well for the last few minutes meant he pulled away a little for it, though he didn't let go of Jolen. His once-again bright blue eyes searched Jolen's face before he reached for the tissues, wiping his face clean and sniffling occasionally. "I'm sorry..."

<Jolen> Although Jolen didn't totally need to breath through his human lungs he was still left breathless by the kiss. "It's ok you just lost control thats all, everyone does it and see? I'm fine now just alittle dizzy is all." Smiling and taking the tissue of Toxic so he could help wipe the bloody tears away.

<@Toxic> "But I...I nearly...I can remember it, Jolen, what I can do a-and...I nearly did it to you." Adam clung to him a little, not willing to let him go, still shaking as he nuzzled into Jolen's hair - just like he had the first night they'd met. He could remember it!

<@Toxic> He pulled back, eyes wide. "...I can...remember you - when we first met, doing...doing body shots-" He smiled widely then, even as he blushed, sniffling - before he gave Jolen another confused look. "Why...why did you kiss me?"

<Jolen> "It's ok I nearly destroyed the school when I lost control, I'm ok I just need like a sugary drink and I'll be right again." Smiling he didn't actually want to move out of Toxic's lap or the guys arms. "Ja, that was a fun night, and you ended up making a mess because of the cake vodka."

<Jolen> Face beaming because Adam was remembering things right before the blush hit. "I ended up getting alittle drunk while you were away and getting some company off a friend.... afterwards I couldn't stop thinking about how if you didn't come back I wouldn't get to find out what it was like to kiss you... and I thought it would make a good distraction.

<@Toxic> "Oh...yeah...I did, didn't I..." Adam blushed brightly then. "You...you did? I mean you really...wanted to? I..." He didn't know how to react. "Does that mean...I mean...you...want me? Or you like me or - I don't know, I-I-"

<Jolen> "Want you how?" Tilting his head until it hurt to much and stopping. "Of course I like you I wouldn't cuddle you to sleep every night if I didn't." Smiling at the guy above him and pushing the dreads out of his face. "If you mean wanted to kiss you then yes."

<@Toxic> Adam blinked at him, actually shy. "Meant...bit more than...I mean...more than kissing and...and friends..." He swallowed, not sure what he was feeling right now, just that...whatever it was had stopped the panic and made him feel...happy. "...Really?"

<Jolen> "Yes I wanted to kiss you Adam I like you and we're good friends and closer then most I think?" Because this was very untried waters for him, not knowing if Adam was after sex or something else. "More then kissing? you mean am I after sex with you?"

<@Toxic> "Yes. No. I don't know." Adam took a deep breath. "All I know is that I l-like you - a lot, I mean maybe a bit more than like - and maybe, I mean maybe we're closer than friends but I-I don't know because - fuck, because I don't know, I just like you."

<Jolen> Jolen blinked at Adam. After a few moments silence he got his thoughts together. "Just to be clear I'mnot quite ready for sex just yet, but I think I'd feel safe with you. I would however very much like to continue the kissing as it felt wonderful and I do like and trust you alot." He was starting to feel lost in the panicked babbling

<@Toxic> "No, no sex, I-I'm not so good at that-" He flushed, "-the whole too-sensitive thing, but...but the kissing...I-I can do that...I was...I mean...does this mean...are we...closer than friends now?"

<Jolen> "Then we don't do sex, thats fine no doubt I'd be terrible anyway." Trying to make a joke and calm the guy down from the babbling. His one hand still one adams cheek the other had wormed it's way around the guy to hold him back. "What do you mean closer then friends?"

<@Toxic> Adam nuzzled a little into the hand, actually loving the feel of being held like this. "...I mean...I mean boyfriends." He said the word quietly, chewing his lip, feeling strangely dizzy from everything.

<Jolen> "Boyfriends? Like me being your boyfriend like Remy and Clarice and that....only us?" The question had suprised him quite abit, he was used to the idea of people wanting to kiss him now but have a relationship with him? It was a very strange place.

<@Toxic> "Yeah...yeah, us." Adam swallowed heavily. How'd they get from...oh yeah, Jolen had kissed him. And he'd wanted to ask for ages and never had, because he didn't think it would be fair when he couldn't remember the guy properly.

<Jolen> Jolen swallowed alittle nervously then unsure what to say out of surprise before his slightly bloodshot and tired eyes met the bright hopeful ones above him. "I like you Toxic... and I think I'd like that alot, I hate going back to my room and lseeping alone and I felt very... lost while you were gone."

<@Toxic> Adam swallowed, then smiled, holding Jolen against him and nuzzling into him. "...Good." He said quietly then, nose buried in the other's vines and hair, eyes closing. "...Hope you don't mind me following you like a lost puppy...or should that be bunny." He smiled, finally remembering how he got that nickname.

<Jolen> Sitting up abit he held Adam against him alittle more and smiled. "My lost little bunny.... only not so lost now I have you." Squeezing Adam alittle and nuzzling his way into the dreads as the surprise turn of events brought happy tears.

<@Toxic> Adam sighed, just...relaxing, still shaking from the shock and the after-effects of the nightmare but happy to curl back up in the nest with Jolen, not letting him go. "Mine." He half-breathed, kissing him again. "Thank you."

<Jolen> Letting himself get pulled back into the nest he flopped down after wiping the last of the blood off him, eyes slowly going back to off white. Then he snuggled down next to his new *boyfriend* and happily kissed back. "Thank you to.... and yours happily."